I have spent a lot of this year feeling like a racehorse stuck behind the gate after the starting gun fires. Ideas are the fullest they’ve ever been, strategies are mapped, I’m ready to race, and then…womp. Another life department – usually family – needs my immediate energy and so, so much more time than I bargained for.
Since family is one of my highest priorities, and I value being a hands-on, present parent, my projects get back-burnered. But business progress is a vital value, too! Ahhh!
My most treasured values are competing and colliding.
Do you also feel pulled by different aspects of your life? Got the sense that a decision is comin’ to a head but confused how to make a choice when all the stakes seem high?
Sometimes life calls for us to change tack. Sometimes forging forward comes at too great a cost.
When we stop arguing with reality , we can see that the timing is just not right. But we’re struggling to accept that. So we rail, and push, and insist on things unfolding the way we envision. And that doesn’t usually go so well.
It’s only with hindsight, way in the future, that we see that there was actually a perfectly good reason that we slowed down. Or toughed it out. Or honored a different part of our life.
We often find ourselves grateful that things panned out different than we planned because some unknown thing was on the horizon. So here’s what you can do:
Imagine your Future Self 5 years down the road with the dilemma you now face behind you. You made a choice and life continued on.
How do you feel, 5 years out, if you stick with your current tack? Do you feel relief? Pride? Alignment? Guilt? Regret? Plain old ickiness?
What elements of your life fade away as the years go by? What’s most important is what’s left.
Then check out what your Future Self thinks of the other tack. The option where you need to change course, do something different, or honor a different part of your life or values. How do you feel with that choice? Get real honest and investigate:
Where’s the rightness?
The rightness reveals the choice most aligned with who you are growing into. Your Future Self. The one with the perfect hindsight.
It’s so personal that we must do it for ourselves. No amount of consulting our Others will pick the best choice. And believe me:
You got this.
Where are you feeling your values collide? What does your Future Self have to say about the choices? Let us know in the comments so we can learn from each other. ❤️